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Black Tie Only

The year: 1998. The day: March 23. The event: The 70th Annual Academy Awards, the Oscars. Film’s biggest, longest, sparkliest night. I was maybe 12 years old, and only watched for one reason: In the vain hope my main man Leo would show, even though the Academy had committed a most-grievous crime in denying him a nomination. He was the king of the world for cryin’ out loud! And so dreamy! Rumour had it Leo would not be attending the ceremony, but I’d still get to hear Celine belt out Heart of the Ocean one more time.


It was honestly a magical moment – I didn’t really know why the camera panned to Jack Nicholson so many times, or what was wrong with that Joan Rivers lady, but I did see my parents laugh a whole lot at Billy Crystal’s opening monologue/montage, thus I, too, laughed a whole lot. Leo never showed, Titanic swept every category, and I bragged to anyone who would listen at school the next day that I stayed up for the whole darn thing.


Most people find them boring, silly, and just a little over the top. But every year, whether I’ve seen all or none of the nominated films, I carve a little time out of my night to buy into it all. In honour of film’s greatest night and Ryan Seacrest’s stupid face, I’ll be wearing my version of tuxedo for tonight’s festivities – complete with a bowtie.


The necklace was a pre-checkout buy at the Salvation Army, the clutch I can’t recall, my faithful CK blazer is also from the Sally Anne, but my favourite part of my “tuxedo” is the blouse. This blouse is Zara, 100% silk, and brand-spankin’ new. The tags were still attached, and some poor sucker spent $89.99 on theirs. I, on the other hand, spent $6.99 on mine. It may not be an Oscar, but that sure feels like a win.

PS – I’ll be live-tweeting as much as possible. Follow along for my picks on best dressed and whether salt n’ vinegar chips really are that much better than dill pickle.

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