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Zack Attack

WordPress informed me that I’ve now published 30 posts. It used an exclamation mark to tell me this, so I’m assuming it’s a pretty big deal. Now that I’m 30 posts into this little endeavour, a style is starting to take shape. As you can tell, I don’t post everything I wear. This is partly because I don’t have that many clothes, and partly because I only write about an outfit if triggers a post-worthy idea. Sometimes what I wear prompts a reflection on a childhood memory, other times it recalls a favourite artist of mine, and still other times the clothing itself tells an interesting enough story.

However, there are other times when I find something I love, and want to write about it, but have nothing of real value to say. That’s what’s happened here today. See, I found this lovely Talbots dress at a beautiful consignment shop in Belleville, Ontario. It was half-price, so at $25 it was my splurge for the month. I also bought this neon scarf for $3 at the same store. I wore this dress on a particularly sunny day last week, so it was accompanied by these sunglasses.

I wore it, I loved it, and I waited for the story to arrive so I could put it on the blog. Well,   other than the fact that I think this is a fabulous dress and makes me feel like the editor of a women’s magazine, nothing was coming up to the surface. So, I started thinking on the accessories with this outfit: There’s the neon scarf, and the sunglasses. The first time I wore these sunglasses, Matt called them Risky Business glasses, then called me Tom Cruise for the rest of the day. So, let’s review: I have a nice dress, some neon, and Risky Business. Thinking…thinking…

And  all the sudden, like a vision in orange and blue, I knew the answer. This is what you get when you mix neon and Risky Business:


Unfortunately, this video had little to do with my outfit. And yet upon viewing I completely abandoned by blog and got sucked into the rabbit hole that is classic Saved by the Bell moments. And so I present to you the results of my research:

Remember when Kelly dumped Zack for Jeff? Man, that was sooo low. She looks so pretty in her Juliet dress though. You know, after watching this with fresh eyes, Zack doesn’t really seem all the bummed. He’s like “no bigs, wanna dance?”


Or how about when the gang took off to Malibu for several episodes? It was always such a treat when TV shows went on vacation (like when the Full House gang went to Disney Land and DJ thought Steve was Indiana Jones, classic!). Anyways, back to Saved by the Bell: look at the chemistry between Zack and Stacy. They were formative in my understanding of TV relationships: If you argue enough, you’ll probably end up makin’ out.  It’s a fact. I call it the Pacey n’ Joey paradox, or the Seth n’ Summer phenomenon. For those of you born after 1990, you’ll recognize it as the Dan n’ Blair complex.


Last, but most certainly not least, one cannot walk down Bayside memory lane without this treasure:


That was enough to scare me off caffeine pills FOR LIFE. And gray sweatshirts too. Seriously though, that Zack Morris knows how to hug a girl. There there, Jessie. I’m sure a promising career awaits you. Who knows, maybe you’ll even do a movie!

Ordinarily, at this time in the post, I neatly tie back my tangent to my outfit, and post a few more pictures. I could remark on how even when dressed like a magazine editor, all I want to do is YouTube stuff, and maybe try to BS that into something profound about our generation. But I’ve strayed so far already, all I really want to do is talk more about Saved by the Bell.

Did you enjoy the Zack and Kelly Wedding Special, or did it leave you wanting? Did you also avoid wearing leather jackets for years because you were worried it would make you look like Tori? Should I do an entire clothing series where I pay homage to different Saved by the Bell characters?

…Don’t answer that. I’ve already made up my mind. Class dismissed!


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