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Behind the Seams

I’m coming up on my two week anniversary with the new love of my life, my iPhone. I am currently obsessed with every little thing this fancy phone can do, so I thought it might be fun for me and my new buddy to take you on a thrift trip. This past weekend, I documented a typical saturday in the life of a thrifter like me. I’ve created a play-by-play of all the laughters, tears, heartbreaks and victories that accompany my average thrifting excursion, peppered with the occasional tip, and the frequent unnecessary Instagram filter. Let’s begin!

The first thing one must do when thrifting is prepare for the long journey ahead. For me, this included a breakfast of champions. This has nothing to do with thrifting, but I can’t resist bragging about the life-changing orange-chocolate french toast that kicked off my day. Sweet mother of mary, that’s some eatin’!


With a belly full, I stopped at home briefly to ensure my outfit was thrift-friendly. What makes an outfit thrift-friendly? Leggings. I always thrift in leggings because then I can try on shirts, skirts, and dresses without having to change my bottoms. I also put on some slouchy boots that I could easily remove, and pulled my hair away from my face. That changeroom is a hotbed for static activity.


Hamilton is home to a wonderful assortment of thrift-stores. I could easily hit up five without having to drive more than twenty minutes between them. But I set a more realistic goal for myself, and decided on the Salvation Army and Bibles for Missions. Salvation Army was up first.

I have a specific order for attacking thrift stores. It usually goes: dresses, long sleeve blouses, skirts, short-sleeve blouses, coats, shoes, and housewares. I intended to stick to the order, but upon arrival, I laid eyes on a most-awesome sheer blouse. It was cropped in the front, long in the back, with tres long sleeves. I was already imagining myself looking super-awesome drinking super-lattes (I don’t even drink lattes…) when my vision was abruptly cut short.


Turns out the previous owner of this blouse also drank alotta lattes, and one ended up all over the sleeve. Too bad. Onward!

I resumed my regular order, rounding up a very colourful first haul:

That H&M peach dress in the bottom right corner made it to the change room strictly because it looked so very Kelly Kapowski.

With my arms nearly full, I was about to try on these finds when something unexpected caught my eye.


This sweet jacket was in the pyjama section, with a “Men’s Sportwear” tag. The only person who would consider these pyjamas would be Sue Sylvester. This jacket sums up what I love so much about thrifting – the surprises. Was I looking for an purple and orange Adidas jacket? Heck no! Did I try it on? Heck yes!

All the other items I tried were too big, too short, and too tight, but this jacket was a winner. Will it compel me to start workin’ on my fitness? Probably not. But still – purple!


The last item I tried also referenced another favourite TV character of mine. Can you guess?


That delightful stripy number didn’t fit quite right, but I was already satisfied with my jacket. On my way to the cash, I gave a longing look at all the cute heels that a tall chick like me will never get to wear, and strutted out of the store with my new find tucked under my arm.


*Sigh*

The next stop was Bibles For Missions. I love BFM because everyone there sounds like an Oma. I also love BFM because while their selection is smaller, all the clothing is in fanastic shape. The final reason I love BFM is because they have belts for $.50! That’s a deal from Archie comic days!


I found two belts, and my sister snagged those awesome leopard flats you see. I wanted them, but my toboggan feet wouldn’t fit.

I picked up a few more items to take the change room. Braemar by Jeremy scott is one of those brands I see all the time at thrift stores – he could have his own section. I also giggled when I saw “Totes Coat”.  I’m a loser.


Sadly, that lovely coat had just a lingering scent of mothballs. I’ve learned my lesson with that – it doesn’t go away. I did manage to find another item to take home though:


I love the floral trend that’s here, there, and everywhere these days. Could I have found a similar top at a Forever 21? Probably. But the tag on this top looks so old-school, I take comfort in the fact that it’s probably ten years old and still looks great. I challenge anyone to say that about something from F21 in ten years.

The grand total? 2 belts, 1 jacket, and 1 top. All in all, not a bad little saturday. I hope you enjoyed my play-by-play. Maybe next time I’ll make a video, with effects! It will go something like this: Star-wipe! Profound quote! Fade to black. Morgan Freeman Narration. End scene.

You can just give me my Oscar right now.

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